Monday, January 17, 2011

Part TWO: What to do when your child looses control in Target?

You might be asking what prompted the baby fit in Target, if you read my previous blogs or how did I handle it?  First, I love Marcia.  She is an amazing little girl with a fire for life!  She is not afraid to tell you or show you how she feels!  She is a very passionate little girl.  So, dealing with Marica is very different then dealing with Makenna and Markus. ( not that they are not passionate, they show deal and show their emotions diferently!)  I think sometimes we forget that every kid is different and we have to know and understand each personality so we can effectivelyly communicate and teach them.

We were checking out of Target and Marcia spotted her favorite package of Gum!  As soon as she saw it she wanted it and she wanted it now!  So she picked it up and asked me if she could buy it because she really wanted it.  I said to her, I know its your favorite gum and you can have it as long as you buy it with your money.  Do you have your money?  Normally, if she has her money, she thinks twice and decides she doesn't want to spend her money on it and decides to save it!  Today, was not the case!  She didn't have any money and wanted me to buy it!  I explained to her ONCE that sorry we were not buying Gum today and that was the start of the baby fit!  ( I also know that she had so many emotions going on because Marie was just a few weeks old!)  As the kids and I began walking to the doors to our car, she screamed louder and louder, dropped to her knees and held on to my legs!!!  I did not give in!  If I would of given in she would do this again some other time!  I kept walking and dragged her all the way to the cement outside the doors and I know everyone was starring at all of us!  Markus and Makenna were trying to get to the car so nobody would see them!!! 
 She finally got up and walked to the car with us but continued to scream.  I still am remaining calm and KEEPING THE END in mind!  I put the bags in the car, she climbs in her seat and begins to calm down.  2 minutes after sitting there, she looked at me and said she was sorry.  I asked her what she was sorry for and she said, "for DISOBEYING you. I'm sorry for throwing a baby fit."  She didn't say it because I made her, she said it and really meant it. I told her I still love her and I forgave her.  I was able to use that moment as a great teaching moment for Marcia, Makenna and Markus.  We talked about Self-control and obeying.  If I would of gotten myself all upset and screamed back at her, I would of lost the teaching moment and would of taught her how to have a baby fit as an adult!  When we got home, she went in her room for time out for what she did, but she knew how much I still love her and she was forgiven!

She is know different than some adults I know!  We see things we want and want them now.  Even though they can't afford it they have their baby fit buy getting a credit card and buying in anyway .  They have no self control! ( I know I use to be like that! ) By teaching your kids now self-control you are setting them up for success as an adult.  By teaching them how to be obedient to you is teaching them how to be obedient to God and to listen to him even when you don't want to. By teaching your kids to forgive and love even when we make mistakes is teaching them that God loves us so much and forgives us every time we come to him with a heart of repentance!   Does it mean she won't do this again...I don't know, but I do know she knows I love her with all my heart and learned a major life lesson and 4 years old! Its all about planting the seeds and being the example!

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