The count down begins only 7 more days until Christmas! Yes, this can be a wonderful time of the year. Time to get together with friends and family you might not see much during the year or running into friends while you are shopping! Its so fun seeing people that you normally wouldn't see. Even if you are friends with them on FB and know exactly what they are doing, its not the same as seeing them face to face!
However, with all the expectations of Christmas and visiting family and friends, I think many of us can have feelings of disappointments. We have all these thoughts of what Christmas will be like and get so excited about getting together with everyone, that when someone doesn't show up or isn't as thrilled about Christmas as you are, we start to feel discouraged. We have hopes of families and friends putting the past behind us but to find out some of the people we love dearly may not feel the same about us. For many people Christmas can be a time of great pain.
I'm here to remind everyone that if you a "normal family" all of us have some sort of dysfunction in our families! If you focus on the dysfunction, you will miss the true joy of Christmas. I know this may not be easy for many people because their is so much hurt in their families or painful memories at this time of the year. But it all depends on what you want to focus on. If you put your focus on people, even your family, you will have feelings of disappointments. If you focus on the dysfunction, you will miss the joy of Christmas. I believe when we have those feelings, its God reminding us not to focus on the world only him! He is the reason for the season. Whether you have a very close family, are all alone or a family like mine the "Griswalds" know that the only way to truly enjoy this year is to keep your eye on Jesus and you will never be alone or disappointed!
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Thursday, December 16, 2010
Can You Keep up with all the Expecations of Christmas???
Until 2 years ago, Mark and I were doing what 98% of the population does on Christmas, spend so much money and focused on the all the wrong reasons to celebrate Christmas. We would find ourselves kinda depressed or a feeling like this is it? All the planning, shopping and excitement of getting together with family and then seconds after the gifts are opened and dinner is eaten we had the feeling like this is it! All of that and its all over in one day.
All the gifts we bought the kids and our family members just never seemed enough. So, we would go out to the stores just one more time and buy just a few more gifts to put under the tree. Half the time we just bought the gifts for our kids because heaven forbid our kids go to school and don't have all the cool and latest toys and gadgets as their friends. Every year we were trying to out do ourselves from the next year and it was getting exhausting and we didn't like what this was teaching our kids.
God spoke to our hearts. We were having those feelings like who is this for? We knew it wasn't for God because he doesn't need this stuff. It wasn't really for our kids, because they didn't need it. Was it for us? Where we sucked in to the materialism and commercialism of this world telling us that more is better? Of course the answer was Yes.
We have changed our traditions on how we celebrate Christmas. Yes, we still do Santa but its know where like it use to be. We give our kids a FEW gifts and we don't over spend, which is not easy! (Makenna and Markus know longer believe in Santa. When they asked us if he was real Mark and I didn't want to lie to them. We wanted them to understand Santa was for fun and using our imagination but we wanted them to know that God is real and to know and believe in the true spirit of Christmas) We have taught them the true meaning of Christmas which isn't just looking at the manager you put on your fireplace. Its not about just picking up a tag on the Christmas tree at church and buying a gift a target. (this is nice but its so much more) Its about Jesus and his birth. Its about giving to him. I don't share this story to pat myself on the back to say Mark and I are the greatest parents, because we are not. This is all God and his doing. We really want our kids to experience what it means to give, to see the pain in the world and to truly recognize how blessed we are. To put others before ourselves.
Two years ago a friend of mine shared a story on what she was doing for the homeless. Mark and I were able to do it with the kids. You don't need a Church or a huge group of people to do the work Jesus has called you to do! We made lunches for the homeless. Makenna wrote Scripture on an index card and put it in the bag and we went down to the heart of Detroit to a shelter. It was great learning experience for them and then after we took them for a treat to Lafayette Cony Island! (they have been wanting to go there because they watched in on TV diners!!!) This year we are doing something completely different. They still talk about it to this day!
This year don't kill yourself because you can't keep up with the Joneses or yourself from the previous years. Instead put the focus on the one who matters and do something for someone else this year. It will give you more joy then giving another present to someone who really doesn't need anything but your love!
All the gifts we bought the kids and our family members just never seemed enough. So, we would go out to the stores just one more time and buy just a few more gifts to put under the tree. Half the time we just bought the gifts for our kids because heaven forbid our kids go to school and don't have all the cool and latest toys and gadgets as their friends. Every year we were trying to out do ourselves from the next year and it was getting exhausting and we didn't like what this was teaching our kids.
God spoke to our hearts. We were having those feelings like who is this for? We knew it wasn't for God because he doesn't need this stuff. It wasn't really for our kids, because they didn't need it. Was it for us? Where we sucked in to the materialism and commercialism of this world telling us that more is better? Of course the answer was Yes.
We have changed our traditions on how we celebrate Christmas. Yes, we still do Santa but its know where like it use to be. We give our kids a FEW gifts and we don't over spend, which is not easy! (Makenna and Markus know longer believe in Santa. When they asked us if he was real Mark and I didn't want to lie to them. We wanted them to understand Santa was for fun and using our imagination but we wanted them to know that God is real and to know and believe in the true spirit of Christmas) We have taught them the true meaning of Christmas which isn't just looking at the manager you put on your fireplace. Its not about just picking up a tag on the Christmas tree at church and buying a gift a target. (this is nice but its so much more) Its about Jesus and his birth. Its about giving to him. I don't share this story to pat myself on the back to say Mark and I are the greatest parents, because we are not. This is all God and his doing. We really want our kids to experience what it means to give, to see the pain in the world and to truly recognize how blessed we are. To put others before ourselves.
Two years ago a friend of mine shared a story on what she was doing for the homeless. Mark and I were able to do it with the kids. You don't need a Church or a huge group of people to do the work Jesus has called you to do! We made lunches for the homeless. Makenna wrote Scripture on an index card and put it in the bag and we went down to the heart of Detroit to a shelter. It was great learning experience for them and then after we took them for a treat to Lafayette Cony Island! (they have been wanting to go there because they watched in on TV diners!!!) This year we are doing something completely different. They still talk about it to this day!
This year don't kill yourself because you can't keep up with the Joneses or yourself from the previous years. Instead put the focus on the one who matters and do something for someone else this year. It will give you more joy then giving another present to someone who really doesn't need anything but your love!
What has God Done For You???
Christmas time can be a great time of Joy. Its a great time to get together with family and friends. Its a time more people are focused on giving and reaching out to help someone in need. Its a great time to reminisce, laugh and be thankful for the life God has given us. Gathering with people we love and celebrating the birth of Christ is the best time of the year.
However, many people are going through so much at this time of year. Many people are without a job, lost a love one, dealing with sickness either with themselves or with someone they love so much, divorce, or are all alone. Some people know why we celebrate Christmas, however because of all the hurt they are dealing with in their life or trying to maintain the expectations of what the world says about Christmas, they feel empty and are slowly loosing hope.
Today, instead of me writing about my experiences or thoughts on faith, hope and even suffering, I would love for you to post your comments on how God has healed you. Your words might help someone else and bless them this Christmas season...
God has promised that all things work together for good to those who love and serve Him faithfully (Romans 8:28).
However, many people are going through so much at this time of year. Many people are without a job, lost a love one, dealing with sickness either with themselves or with someone they love so much, divorce, or are all alone. Some people know why we celebrate Christmas, however because of all the hurt they are dealing with in their life or trying to maintain the expectations of what the world says about Christmas, they feel empty and are slowly loosing hope.
Today, instead of me writing about my experiences or thoughts on faith, hope and even suffering, I would love for you to post your comments on how God has healed you. Your words might help someone else and bless them this Christmas season...
God has promised that all things work together for good to those who love and serve Him faithfully (Romans 8:28).
Monday, December 6, 2010
Can You Please Forgive Me for Stealing???
Have you ever did anything that you know you shouldn't do, but you think what the heck, its really know big deal? You try to find reasons to validate what you are doing. It happened to me this past month.
I knew better but sometimes we make mistakes and give in because everyone else is doing it. Thankfully, I surround myself with people who encourage me but also hold me accountable for my actions. It hit me a few weeks ago, when talking to a friend a church. If the saying is true,"how you do anything, is how you do everything," then the littlest things matter.
Anyway, mark and I are doing p90x. My cousin has the dvd's and to save a few bucks, we asked him if we could borrow his cd's. I decided lets burn the DVD's so we have our own copies. There are people I'm sure that don't think there is anything wrong with this, but there is its stealing. There are people who make a living selling CD's and DVD's and if we burn them we are taking money from them. I'm sure there are people who think, some of these people make a ton of money and they don't need it or will miss it and that is still wrong. They have worked very hard putting there info out there for us and if we can't pay for it then we don't need it. If you want to make a ton of money like them, then create your program. One day I hope to have CD's and books out there and would I want someone stealing from me?
The little things matter and they all add up. Think about it all it took was a bite of an apple from Adam and Eve in the garden. They knew better but they I'm sure they thought just this one time won't hurt and it did and we are all paying for it because of one dumb little but huge mistake. "Let the thief no longer steal, but rather let him labor,doing honest work with his own hands, so that he may Have something to share with anyone in need." Ephesians 4:28. "you shall not steal" Exodus 20:15. "And Jesus said, You shall not murder, you shall not commit adultery, you sall not steal and you shall not bear false witness. "Matthew 19:18.
So, the DVD's we burned are going in the garbage. I'm so thankful God is a forgiving God and can forgive me for making such stupid mistakes! Thankful for my dear friend for remindng me!
I knew better but sometimes we make mistakes and give in because everyone else is doing it. Thankfully, I surround myself with people who encourage me but also hold me accountable for my actions. It hit me a few weeks ago, when talking to a friend a church. If the saying is true,"how you do anything, is how you do everything," then the littlest things matter.
Anyway, mark and I are doing p90x. My cousin has the dvd's and to save a few bucks, we asked him if we could borrow his cd's. I decided lets burn the DVD's so we have our own copies. There are people I'm sure that don't think there is anything wrong with this, but there is its stealing. There are people who make a living selling CD's and DVD's and if we burn them we are taking money from them. I'm sure there are people who think, some of these people make a ton of money and they don't need it or will miss it and that is still wrong. They have worked very hard putting there info out there for us and if we can't pay for it then we don't need it. If you want to make a ton of money like them, then create your program. One day I hope to have CD's and books out there and would I want someone stealing from me?
The little things matter and they all add up. Think about it all it took was a bite of an apple from Adam and Eve in the garden. They knew better but they I'm sure they thought just this one time won't hurt and it did and we are all paying for it because of one dumb little but huge mistake. "Let the thief no longer steal, but rather let him labor,doing honest work with his own hands, so that he may Have something to share with anyone in need." Ephesians 4:28. "you shall not steal" Exodus 20:15. "And Jesus said, You shall not murder, you shall not commit adultery, you sall not steal and you shall not bear false witness. "Matthew 19:18.
So, the DVD's we burned are going in the garbage. I'm so thankful God is a forgiving God and can forgive me for making such stupid mistakes! Thankful for my dear friend for remindng me!
Sunday, December 5, 2010
What to do When Your Neighbor Loses Your Dog!
What do yo do when you ask your neighbor( who is a grown man) to let your dogs out while you are gone and you come home and the your dog which is 16 yeras old, deaf and blind is missing?
Last night around midnight we walked into the door from a long ride home from Grand Rapids expecting to find our dogs sleeping. Instead, we found the back door to our sun room opened, the screed door opened and the door going to our backyard open and one of our dogs missing.
We house sit our neighbors dog for them, so this was one of the first times we asked him to let our dogs out. When we found kodi missing, we were very upset especially becasue she is so old. Mark was up driving around looking for her and I called all the police stations asking if anyone turned her in and the aswers have been NO.
What do I do? What do I teach my kids because I know there are lessons to learn from this. After I made the phone calls and had no luck, I sat the kids in bed and had a talk with them.
First, Everyone makes me mistakes. Yes, we are sad and I'm upset, but we have to find forgiveness.
Second. How you do anything is how you do everything. God cannot bless you nor will he if you don't learn how to take care of the little the things. If you can't take care of the little things how in the world can you handle anything big. Its important not to be careless and to treat other peoples belongings just like how you would treat your own. When someone asks you to do something and you say yes, to give it 100%.
Truth is Mark and I have been talking about putting Kodi to sleep for 2 years and haven't had the guts to follow through with it. Yes, the kids are sad and so are Mark and I because we didn't get to say goodbye but at least something didn't happen to one of us or to a PERSON we care and love. Also, it just reminds us that you never know when something will be taken from you or when someone you love could pass away, so to make everyday count and always tell the person and yes even your dog how much you love them...
We pray that someone has her and will turn her in so we get a second chance at saying goodbye...
Last night around midnight we walked into the door from a long ride home from Grand Rapids expecting to find our dogs sleeping. Instead, we found the back door to our sun room opened, the screed door opened and the door going to our backyard open and one of our dogs missing.
We house sit our neighbors dog for them, so this was one of the first times we asked him to let our dogs out. When we found kodi missing, we were very upset especially becasue she is so old. Mark was up driving around looking for her and I called all the police stations asking if anyone turned her in and the aswers have been NO.
What do I do? What do I teach my kids because I know there are lessons to learn from this. After I made the phone calls and had no luck, I sat the kids in bed and had a talk with them.
First, Everyone makes me mistakes. Yes, we are sad and I'm upset, but we have to find forgiveness.
Second. How you do anything is how you do everything. God cannot bless you nor will he if you don't learn how to take care of the little the things. If you can't take care of the little things how in the world can you handle anything big. Its important not to be careless and to treat other peoples belongings just like how you would treat your own. When someone asks you to do something and you say yes, to give it 100%.
Truth is Mark and I have been talking about putting Kodi to sleep for 2 years and haven't had the guts to follow through with it. Yes, the kids are sad and so are Mark and I because we didn't get to say goodbye but at least something didn't happen to one of us or to a PERSON we care and love. Also, it just reminds us that you never know when something will be taken from you or when someone you love could pass away, so to make everyday count and always tell the person and yes even your dog how much you love them...
We pray that someone has her and will turn her in so we get a second chance at saying goodbye...
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Are Competivite Sports Healthy For Kids??? Part 2
Gymnastics season officially starts for us tomorrow!!!
As Makenna is preparing herself for her first meet, she understand that she isn't in competition with anyone. She doesn't go to her meets to beat another girl or another team. She doesn't compare herself to other girls and mark and I don't compare her with other gymnast either. There are girls that are better than her and girls Makenna is better than and that is called life! We will meet people who are prettier, smarter and have more athletic ability than us and vice verse. So, we have to learn how to stay focus on our gifts and be grateful for what we have and to be happy for everyone else too. If we are always comparing ourselves with someone else or wanting what they have, we will miss the beauty God has given each of us.
We are teaching Makenna (and Markus and Marcia) its not about going to the meets to beat another team. Its not about winning the trophy or metals and its not about the score. (However, it is nice to win!!!) Its about taking all the gifts and talent God has given you and shinning for him. She has learned to ask God for help and to let him work in her at the age of 10 years old! She use to feel like she was bragging if she went on the gymnastics floor and gave it her all, which is absolutely wrong. God wants you to succeed and he wants you to give your best because when we do good, it makes God look good and he gets all the glory. Makenna knows when someone looks at her they see the light of Jesus. Think about it, when your kids do well doesn't it make you so happy and proud. It makes you look good! This is how God feels about all of us. Also, our kids are learning its not all about them that they have a responsibility to take their gifts and talents and bless other people...
Today, whether its taking care of your kids, cleaning the house, going to work or moving toward your God given purpose, do it with the right attitude and shine not for yourself but for your father in heaven and give him the glory he deserves.
As Makenna is preparing herself for her first meet, she understand that she isn't in competition with anyone. She doesn't go to her meets to beat another girl or another team. She doesn't compare herself to other girls and mark and I don't compare her with other gymnast either. There are girls that are better than her and girls Makenna is better than and that is called life! We will meet people who are prettier, smarter and have more athletic ability than us and vice verse. So, we have to learn how to stay focus on our gifts and be grateful for what we have and to be happy for everyone else too. If we are always comparing ourselves with someone else or wanting what they have, we will miss the beauty God has given each of us.
We are teaching Makenna (and Markus and Marcia) its not about going to the meets to beat another team. Its not about winning the trophy or metals and its not about the score. (However, it is nice to win!!!) Its about taking all the gifts and talent God has given you and shinning for him. She has learned to ask God for help and to let him work in her at the age of 10 years old! She use to feel like she was bragging if she went on the gymnastics floor and gave it her all, which is absolutely wrong. God wants you to succeed and he wants you to give your best because when we do good, it makes God look good and he gets all the glory. Makenna knows when someone looks at her they see the light of Jesus. Think about it, when your kids do well doesn't it make you so happy and proud. It makes you look good! This is how God feels about all of us. Also, our kids are learning its not all about them that they have a responsibility to take their gifts and talents and bless other people...
Today, whether its taking care of your kids, cleaning the house, going to work or moving toward your God given purpose, do it with the right attitude and shine not for yourself but for your father in heaven and give him the glory he deserves.
Friday, December 3, 2010
Are Competitive Sports Healthy for Kids???? Part One
Makenna first gymnastics meet for the season starts this Saturday! We are all excited and can't wait to watch her use her gifts that God has given her. I know there are people who don't agree with competitive sports and probably for good reasons. However, I've seen and witnessed the benefits of sports in my life, my husband and my kids lives. There is a such thing as healthy competition. Mark and I have been able to use gymnastics for Makenna and Karate for Markus and Marcia as another fertile ground to teach them important life lessons. (which I will share in future blogs) I don't think sports are the problem. Its the coaches and parents who don't have their morals and values in check and act like morons that are the problems. When the parents act crazy then so do their kids! So, its important to make sure the coaches that are teaching and spending time with your kid has the same values as you do. If they don't and its not a healthy environment you are setting your child up for disaster.
Its so important as parents to do our job to teach our kids about balance. I know Makenna loves gymnastics and probably would spend every day in the gym if we allowed her too, but what is that teaching her? Its teaching her to be a workaholic and idols success as an adult and that is not healthy. In our house it is God, family, school and then whatever comes after. If anything begins to feel or look chaotic we know are priorities are all out of whack.
Makenna has big goals and she knows with God and hard work, anything is possible. (I love when kids and adults and bigger visions for their life. However, the majority of kids and adults have big ideas but sit on their behinds and play video games all day or won't take the time to sharpen their skills in order to reach their dreams. If you are going to dream big and use the gifts and talent God has given you, then you need to work on them everyday. If someone thinks they can accomplish something by wishing or doing nothing I have bad news for you that is a poverty mindset. The bible says, "He who works his land will have abundant food, but he who chases fantasies lacks judgment. Proverbs 12:11. We teach the kids to dream big but in order to do that you have to learn how to work and it starts at home first!
Its so important as parents to do our job to teach our kids about balance. I know Makenna loves gymnastics and probably would spend every day in the gym if we allowed her too, but what is that teaching her? Its teaching her to be a workaholic and idols success as an adult and that is not healthy. In our house it is God, family, school and then whatever comes after. If anything begins to feel or look chaotic we know are priorities are all out of whack.
Makenna has big goals and she knows with God and hard work, anything is possible. (I love when kids and adults and bigger visions for their life. However, the majority of kids and adults have big ideas but sit on their behinds and play video games all day or won't take the time to sharpen their skills in order to reach their dreams. If you are going to dream big and use the gifts and talent God has given you, then you need to work on them everyday. If someone thinks they can accomplish something by wishing or doing nothing I have bad news for you that is a poverty mindset. The bible says, "He who works his land will have abundant food, but he who chases fantasies lacks judgment. Proverbs 12:11. We teach the kids to dream big but in order to do that you have to learn how to work and it starts at home first!
Do You Dread Putting Your Kids to Bed?
Putting my kids to bed last night was one of those nights! You know what kind of bedtime nightmare I'm talking about. The one when your daughter knows how to work you and get you to get her water, then milk, turn on the bathroom light, run out of her room 10 times to say good night and kiss you one more time! As much as you are trying to keep your cool, you just want your kids to go to bed so you can have a least 10 minutes of quite time before you pass out of exhaustion! The more they came out of their room the crankier I was feeling. I looked my daughter Marcia and said in a loud voice, "GET IN BED." She looks at me with her sweet face and says, "Mom all you have to do is say it in your nice voice! Can you please talk nice to me." What do am I suppose to say about that?
So, I look at her and in my nice voice I ask her to go to bed. She looks at me and say OK and off to bed she went and she never snuck out of her room again! know being a mom is not easy and sometimes our kids just know how to push our buttons! We have to remember that is their job! I know that sounds crazy but they are kids for a reason and we are the parents. Its our job to teach our kids self-control, patience, kindness, respect and love. If they through a baby fit and we through one back, what is that teaching them? We have to make sure we are preaching what we practice. Ask yourself, the way you talk to your kids, would you want your spouse or boss to talk to you the way you speak to them? I can guarantee the answer is no. Ask anyone, I'm a fanatic about words and how we speak to each other and to ourselves. I'm not perfect but its something I take very serious. But why do adults who know better talk to children the way they do. We have to show them the way because when they know better then they can do better.
So, I look at her and in my nice voice I ask her to go to bed. She looks at me and say OK and off to bed she went and she never snuck out of her room again! know being a mom is not easy and sometimes our kids just know how to push our buttons! We have to remember that is their job! I know that sounds crazy but they are kids for a reason and we are the parents. Its our job to teach our kids self-control, patience, kindness, respect and love. If they through a baby fit and we through one back, what is that teaching them? We have to make sure we are preaching what we practice. Ask yourself, the way you talk to your kids, would you want your spouse or boss to talk to you the way you speak to them? I can guarantee the answer is no. Ask anyone, I'm a fanatic about words and how we speak to each other and to ourselves. I'm not perfect but its something I take very serious. But why do adults who know better talk to children the way they do. We have to show them the way because when they know better then they can do better.
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